I don’t know what I’m waiting for.
An indication of change.
Something that will tell me that things will be okay.
Will this sign ever come?
I truly hope so…
…as I have hoped and dreamed about so many things yet nothing seems to materialize out of my hard work.
was it even worth it?
all of the pain
the sleepless nights
sure, you look up to my achievements and how I balanced everything I was involved with
but you didn’t see the fraying tightrope, swaying beneath my feet
you didn’t feel the dark, rushing current below
you didn’t feel hopeless, lost, or afraid
you have no idea
It is the disappointment that hits the hardest.
It is a crushing boulder rolling down the mountain that you painstakingly trekked
a wall that you slam your entire body into after taking off from the starting line
a permanent weight on your sagging shoulders
that tells you
that the road is long,
the journey is tough,
and things might not work out
that they would